Don’t encourage a Playboy appearance

I didn’t want to write about this.  I really didn’t.  I usually try and avoid the negative stories and talk about the good things that happen for dads and daughters, but I just had to comment on this.  Lindsay Lohan’s dad backs her Playboy spread.  Look, I’m not the most up on internet stuff, but I know what Playboy is and only very large boulders could keep you from hearing about Lohan’s misadventures.

Almost enough to cover the Kardashian thing

Let me just state this simply: this is not right.  A dad shouldn’t applaud his daughter reducing herself to physical eye candy for monetary gain.  He shouldn’t see a situation like this and feel like things are okay.  I know this is a slippery slope, but let’s look ourselves in the face here.  Stop what you’re doing and truly answer this: Do you want your daughter to be in Playboy?  Simple “yes” or “no”.

 

Now, I know that’s somewhat subjective and as parents we back our kids, but look at what we’re doing right now.  We’re taking the time to invest in our daughters, to show them that they are loved, that they are capable of anything, and that they have something meaningful to do in this world.  We’re not teaching them to be strippers, we’re teaching them to be teachers, scientists, moms, historians, and artists.

 

I know that Lohan and her dad have had a tough relationship, but even Chris Rock that said, “They don’t grade fathers, but if your daughter’s a stripper, you [messed] up!”.  And that’s coming from Chris Rock!  These are all pretty harsh words for this blog, but I hope you’ll forgive me.  I’m really tired of things like this in the media portraying messed up relationships as the norm.  We can avoid it just by being a good dad.  Being there for her.  Spending one on one time with her.  Showing her she’s loved.  In the end, it’s the most important job we’ll do.

He probably got offended by that Chris Rock quote

Guys, go out and do it.  Not because you’re trying to avoid some future consequence but because it’s the right thing to do here and now, for her.  Don’t look at that news story and just think “that’s messed up” while your daughter plays on the floor by herself.  Don’t sit back and wait for 15 years to fly by and wonder where it all went.  At ANY AGE, she’s looking for time with her dad.  Get involved; spend the time with her; go out and do it.

A simple statue, a simple message

Thanks for reading and thanks for being a dad…

 

-Scott-

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5 thoughts on “Don’t encourage a Playboy appearance

  1. Scott,

    I raised my daughters to know and fully understand the difference between right and wrong and to focus on making the right decisions and choices for themselves as they see best. You can educate and teach your children, but you can’t make their decisions for them, at least not after they reach 18. After that they are fully responsible for their choices and the consequences that come from them.

    I have two daughters that are now young adults and two that are toddlers. The one thing that I pride myself on is fully supporting my children in whatever decisions they make. I WILL be there for them regardless. While I’d like to protect them from all the pain and suffering they will likely encounter through life, it’s just not possible. The best I can do is to fully support them and be there when needed.

    If one of my adult daughters came home one day and told me they were going to pose for Playboy I would certainly be shocked, but after asking all of the questions that would obviously pop into my head, I would tell them that I fully support their decision. After all, it’s not about what I would want them to do, it’s about what they choose to do for themselves. I don’t expect their morals, political affiliations, religious preferences, etc. to be identical to mine. I do expect them to think for themselves, act responsibly, take resposibility for their actions, and I’ll ask them to consider their family and friends in making this type of decision and to contemplate the ramifications and fallout when they move forward.

    But in the end, it’s their decision, not ours as parents.

    • Larry, I truly appreciate that you’re supportive of your kids, and I’m not saying don’t support them. I also agree that they’re responsible for their actions, however I’m saying that if we get involved as dads, show them that they’re loved, there is a lower propensity for doing such rash actions. Yes, they can go their own way, for sure, but statistically, girls that have nurturing relationships with their dads make better choices. Back them. Support them. But as you stated: try to teach them right and wrong. Thanks for being a dad.

      -Scott-

  2. Can we not do it all and do it all honestly? Love our children, teach them best we can, keep loving them when they do things with which we do not agree, yet be honest and express that we don’t agree (preferably privately)? Could Linsey Lohan’s Dad said “no comment” when asked by the media? Might he have said to her as Larry, perhaps you’d consider saying to your daughter, “I raised you and loved you and I will always love you. You are now an adult and I don’t get to tell you what to do and what not to do. You have a brain, a heart and a soul and you have to trust yourself and your decisions and live with the consequences of them. if you ask me for my view, I will give it, but I will give it honestly knowing you may or may not like what I say. Yet, no matter whether I agree with your choices, well, most of them anyway, I will never love you less.” Then, if you disagree with her choice and she’s asked, you tell her honestly and why you disagree. BTW, I am not saying it is or is not appropriate for Lindsey Lohan to pose for Playboy. That is a personal moral decision for her to make, as it would be for Larry’s daughter and any other woman (of legal age). Thus, my real point is, don’t we want honesty to be the bedrock of our character and of our relationship with our children? If not, then how do they know we are sincere and honest when we praise and affirm them if they suspect we are disingenuous on other occasions?

    • David, you’re hitting the nail on the head. The guy could have said, “No comment” and then privately talked with his daughter, whatever his feelings might be. Now, given his track record, that was unlikely, but you bring a good point of supporting, but just as they are responsible for their actions and opinions, you are responsible for yours.

      Even if they’re not popular, and at some point, they’re not going to be with our daughters. Thanks for being a dad.

      -Scott-

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